40 Powerful Photos →

So I shouldn’t be aloud to look at photos like this when Im pmsing (and I probably shouldn’t say that on the internet) but these are beautiful.

I do have to say that these are like chick flicks though. They make you emotional in the moment but most people aren’t going to have their lives changed by them, unless they seek to be caught in the moment on photographs or marry a famous person. There are photographs, often taken by regular people and not famous photographers in famous moments, that can change lives. 

But oh, look! The makeout picture from the riots is there! Of course it is. Oh dear… 

In an hour we’re heading for Mexico City! 

Here’s some pictures from the outreach so far! We still have one more week left, in Mexico City, and I’m so excited! 

Last night in Belize

The last night has come. Its strange. I feel like I’ve been adopted in as one of their students here, they’re all around the same age as me. They’ve said the same thing too which is funny.

Tonight after dinner (which my amazing team made and was DELICIOUS) (I just proved to myself that I can’t spell delicious correctly unless I’m singing to that Fergi song in my head…) the base here sent us off in prayer. Wow. It was all translated too which makes me so glad for my students. Something that one of the leaders prayed that really stuck out to me was a thank you to the Lord for the mountains around Mexico City that have light to shine. This comes out of the passage in Matthew 5 that talks about how we carry Gods light in us, and if we cover it up there is no use in having it. Instead that light should be on top of a light stand! I love the symbolism of the city. City on a hill, city of light.

I’m going to miss the people here a lot. A lot a lot. But I really think that my relationships with my students are going to click in a new way like never before. It’ll be good, and something I’ve been reminded of a lot over the past few days is that I don’t have to be brave when I’m upset. Brave to persevere, yes. But when I’m not ok that’s ok. I think thats something I’ve been learning since one of our students left in the end of March. I can see it applies to more things now though.

We still have a week and a half of outreach, then debrief week. I have been so blessed over these past weeks here, and now its time to pour that out! I’ve been soaking a lot over the past few days. It’s been good. And now I have a sushi date booked with my roomie, and I’m ready for Mexico City and the Summer months to follow. Not planning on running away in NYC yet at least. We’ll see if I can find a solid under the table nanny job with a good room or not :P

Pretty much everyone should just read this…

Over the past few days I had been going through life with horrible neck pain. It started from my clicking shoulder muscles on my left side, and climbed up my neck making it difficult and painful for me to look side to side, and causing it to feel heavy to hold my neck up. I was getting massages from anyone and everyone around me, which would temporarily make my shoulder feel better and create some motion in my neck, but as soon as it was over the pain would come back. 

So yesterday during morning worship and devo time with the DP base here we had a little time of prayer, during which everyone prayed for healing for my neck. And it was healed! Jesus is good and amazing. I don’t think I’ve been physically healed before, and it was really, really cool. God fixed my neck! My shoulder is still clicky, but I’ll still be praying for it and its not a distraction like my neck was. He wants to be good to his people. 

So then, after our morning team time I had a talk with my teams head leaders and basically I re-discovered for the hundredth time that I suck and taking criticism when its not sugar coated. I was angry. Really really really pissed off. Its my fault, not anybody else’s. 

I sent a friend an emotional fb message and for hours afterwards my only thoughts were centred on “I’m going to call mom. I’m going home.” It was pretty bad, but once again, totally my fault. 

We went out in the late afternoon to do ministry downtown. I was not excited to go. I wanted to stay in the ocean yelling at no one. I ended up singing U2 songs on the bike because I realized I was being ridiculous. 

Once we were in town I started talking to this guy. His names Stanley. He was open in a way that I haven’t ever seen before. He asked questions about the formation of the bible, about different Christian groups and Jehovah Witnesses and Mormon groups. The questions he asked were completely open and I was able to completely share the message of the gospel. Something I’ve never done before by myself. 

After our program I asked him if he wanted what we’ve got. And he said yes! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. So exciting. Basically the highlight of my life. We talked more about prayer and hearing the voice of God and about spiritual warfare a little bit and I gave him a bible. It was amazing. And then it was time to go. Some people from the base here were around so they were able to get him contact info for a church and to tell him about the community worship nights here. 

So basically for the ride home I was on fire and I realized that I had been so angry and that it was stupid. So today I have to finish the conversation with the leaders that I abandoned, but it’ll be ok. Because while my problems are fully mine and I have to deal with them, this world isn’t about me. 

Throwing the love

Oh, I can do weekly updates again…

Well I’ve been in Belize for just over a week, and have exactly one week left. I’ve started to speak half British in my head because one of the students here is from a town a few hours from London, which I appreciate so much. I can pretend he’s Canadian. Almost. Well not really but he’s not American. I am really growing into love for the USA, but I havent met a non American white person in Months so its kind of exciting. 

Ministry wise, last week we were in an elementary school with not a lot of money tutoring almost every day, and we did a program down town, intercession in a local semi-slum area, free-style evangelism, and handed out food boxes to a few families from the school that the principal connected us with. Tomorrow and Thursday we will be doing community service, and Wednesday we will be doing something with a Christian radio station. Thursday evening is the bases community worship night, for which I will be sharing my testimony at. Friday we will be back at the elementary school, then Saturday back in the semi-slum, Sunday church and a island wide prayer gathering, and Monday a day off/cleaning/packing day before our two day trip back to Pachuca where we will be having our last week and a half of outreach before debrief week. That last bit of outreach will also be in Mexico City half the time. 

Check in.

Physically: Ocean breeze and salt water are healing for my bones. I feel better when I get to stand in the ocean every day and to feel water taking in my body from fingers to toes as it swallows my dive off the end of the dock. I feel my strong arms push off the sandy bottom as the pressure comes off my ears and I come back to the surface. The ocean fuels me. Thank you, God, for making it. Its beautiful. 

We have also been biking at least 12Km almost every day. Thats definitely good for me. The first few days I thought my legs would forever be in a jello-state, but they have returned into their solid ground feeling normality and my bum isn’t bruised.  

Yes, I am tired from the work we are doing, and from the past 7 weeks of outreach, but like I said, the ocean is healing. God’s using his creation for great things in my life. 

Mentally/Emotionally: Kind of all over the place. I’ve been dealing with the mental aspects of some things that I haven’t had to in a very long time (like boys?), and also really just learning what it means to be a leader of a visiting team. 

I’ve spent most of the past 7 months trying to find as much alone time as possible, and now I dont want to be alone. Part of that is that I have my own room, so I’m getting a decent amount of time no matter what. But its also negative because I know I have things that I really need to be seeking God for, but I haven’t been taking the time to do that. I want to be friends with all the students and the staff, and the students at the DTS here are all my age. Its been hard. But the conversations I have had with them are amazing, and everyone from my team understands that I haven’t really made friends in over half a year so they’ve been really understanding with me. I just need wisdom beyond my own with the decisions I make and the words I speak. Which is coming. I just keep needing it. 

I’ve been getting more physical touch here, which is what I need. I don’t really get it because Mexicans can be very touchy. Maybe its because I have my personal space bubble, which they definitely dont have. So I come across as someone that doesn’t want to be near people. And I dont want those “little touches” from guys. I’ll talk to another one of the leaders about this… 

Spiritually: I was doing really well on quiet times when I was in the “desert” aka last week, but now that theres people and an ocean around me I’ve definitely been skipping out more on taking time to really seek the Lord every day. So I’m going to go to sleep now so I can wake up tomorrow and do that. People here have definitely really been challenging me in good ways though. Like with resting in God and just spending time with him not doing things, and with my personal testimony. He’s been teaching me about rest and time too.